Big Apple is all geared up for season’s greetings. It’s all decked up around. Walking past Times Square with Megan and Adrian, I was talking about one fond memory when both Liz and I had come here during my middle school days with dad. It was during this season.
“So what was so special about that visit?” asked Megan. Grabbing the last bite of my burger I looked around and then answered, “It was my cousin, Ned’s 16th birthday. Look! Exactly there, nearly two decades ago I had clicked a group picture with Ned and his friends.” “Oh! I have seen that picture hanging on the wall of your living room,” expressed Adrian. “That’s right. It was a short stay but I had some deep learning,” I expressed.
“Learning? What kind of learning Bob?” asked Megan. “Back then, Ned’s father was a CEO of a reputed company. They were super-rich. That was the very first time I had come over to their place. I come from a very ordinary family. The pomp and grandeur of their house, their lifestyle and their parties had made me go awestruck. I had enjoyed my stay every bit,” I said.
“Then?” Asked Adrian. “When it was time for us to leave, my dad invited my uncle’s family to our home in Southern California. They agreed on coming the next summer. This made me very uncomfortable,” I said. “Why so?” asked Megan.
On my way back I looked very upset and my dad asked me what was wrong. “They are so rich. Our house is not one-fourth of their palatial house. Ned would think poor of Liz and me. How could we call them over?” I had asked. Liz too had the same concern. “We don’t even have enough chairs like theirs in our dining table. Not the nice décor, too.” Liz had further added. Dad gave a smile and said something which stayed on with Liz and me.
“Feelings of insecurity brings in misunderstandings and envy. It is not a good thing to keep inside. If the crux of your bond for any relationship is setting parameters of material wealth to judge, then you can never have a long-lasting relationship. Both of you ask yourselves, why do I feel this way? Are we not confident in offering what we have? Are we inadequate in our hospitality? A big house has no life unless the people who own it have the heart to welcome. Never let wrong and insecure thoughts feed on your mind and give wrong assumptions of yourself,” he expressed.
“Ever since then, I wiped off the feeling of inadequacy from my life completely,” I said. Both Megan and Adrian looked amazed. “Indeed a very good lesson!” expressed Megan. “Applying this thought in our daily life in every sphere will make things so much better,” said Adrian. “Exactly!” I replied.
Every day we come across stories of insecurities. Be it work, friends, relationships or social status, there comes a feeling of not fitting in just because we feel inadequate. We get affected by trifle things and start over-analyzing them. The repeated insecure thought patterns push us away from the right people who actually love and care for us irrespective of our appearance, accomplishments or status. There is no compulsion to be like someone just to feel one of their kind. Never shy away from being your real self to others.
Happy Holidays
December – January