Misadventures in Dating from Editor Bob


How are things at your end? On this side of your computer there are some amazing things going on! The happenings are small if compared to the way my life has turned out in the recent past, still they are making a steady impact. Hop on…

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  Fortune Cookie Day [Jul 20]

After working out his new scheme for ‘doggie dating’ Adrian has been in the best of spirits. He is announcing his arrivals with whistles and his departures with new fancy greetings! His vault of characters have a new lease of oxygen and are thriving. Something is definitely happening in his life. With nothing much to do in my own, I am consciously taking his soliloquies seriously.

The other day, he asked me to contribute some dough for a Chinese take out that he wanted to order for dinner. I did so. He picked it up on his way home. As he was taking the parcels out of the bag, his eyes fell on a small object inside the bag. He immediately lapped it up with a cry, “It’s a fortune cookie!” Now Adrian, I wanted to tell him, how old are you to be so excited with fortune cookies. He hasn’t grown up at all! I kept silent, I was in no mood to entertain him, I was pretty hungry too. He tore off the glossy plastic cover in a flash. Before splitting the cookie, he took a deep breath and closed his eyes. Boy, he was really serious about this! I wanted to tell him not to break it till Fortune Cookie Day, but I relented. I lost patience and headed for the food.

He stared at the message in wide-eyed amazement. His expression told me it was something that did not belong to any extreme. I mean, he didn’t shout in joy, or hold his head in his hands! I asked him, “What is it?” he paused, quiet. He was as still as a statue. “What is it?” I asked again. He gave out no sound. “WHAT IS IT!” I had to ask him three times. Then he passed the chit to me. On it, in italics, was written: ‘Look for new outlets for your own creative abilities!’ I read it out loud and completed the sentence with, “IN BED!” I started laughing out loud.

It was hysterical! Adrian tried to explain me that the last two words were added only to bow to popular culture, it was actually the rest of the sentence that spoke of the fortune. I was too wild with laughter to pay any attention to him. He wanted to be serious right away. He wanted me to take the message seriously, too, but I couldn’t. So he got pissed off and stormed out of the room in frustration. Then he came back to claim his cookie and dinner. I controlled my laughter and asked him to have it in the dining room itself. He ate silently and left to his room to crash. Thankfully he didn’t look at me; I was bloated with laughter!

Gorgeous Grandma Day [Jul 23]

You remember Mrs. Bradley’s son Mike, don’t you? There’s some news on that front that I really have to share with you. It so happened that Mrs. Bradley’s grandson had this terrible fever which refused to let go of that poor kid. Mike was very busy that week and so was his wife. They were particularly worried about the babysitting part. The child was not well and both the husband and the wife were really busy with their respective jobs.

Mrs. Bradley stepped in. She ordered them to bring her grandson to grandma so she can nurse him full time. For once her roses took a back-seat. She devoted all her time and energy to ensure that the child had a good and fast recovery. After the fever came down, Mrs. Bradley looked after him so that he recovered from his weakness. She made the healthiest, organic, and wholesome food you’d find in New York. In the evenings, she allowed Kong to come and play with the child. All three of them had a blast! It was another sort of therapy for Kong but for Kong it really didn’t matter. The important thing is he’s playing and he’s getting his belly rubbed, that’s all that matters to Kong.

Mrs. Bradley can really do wonders to your spirit. It’s uncanny how you feel better and calmer when she is around, I think it’s her aura that calms people. Her grandson is really lucky to have a gorgeous grandma like her. You wouldn’t believe how the child laughed and rolled! There was no trace of the weakness or the fever he had before. Kudos to Mrs. Bradley, the gorgeous grandma!

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  Seeking Adventures In Dating

Taking a cue from Steve, I decided to try out the online dating stuff that he’s such a fan of. There must be something about a love-sick person and the prospect of a date! I really couldn’t resist the temptation. I had resolved not to get down into the murky waters of the dating world without measuring the depth carefully. But Steve’s idea sounded merely like a wish without the risk of hassles…

Anyway, I dived into it. I answered a personal ad for a girl named Alicia. The name reminded me of Aaliyah, but I can’t be having everything the way I want. To my surprise, she responded. We decided to meet at Starbucks for coffee after work. She came in a white shirt and navy blue jeans. The first thing she said was, “I wont have anything. I’m on a diet.” I was like, “Okay” and ordered a coffee for myself. Apparently, she finished off her calorie points and can’t have any more food for the day. All these calculations in the name of beauty and she wasn’t even heavy!

Needless to say, the coffee was the only good thing about the evening. Alicia kept talking about her diet charts, protein powders, dietary supplements and what her dietitians say. She asked about my food habits. It goes without saying that I’m usually on the “see-food-diet” so she started her sermons. This was only the first date folks! By the end of the date, I was totally fed up with her suggestions, opinions, and calculations. Enough of the diet talk! I called up Rick and Adrian and we went to T.G.I. Fridays. Of course Rick was really happy that I had the date with a diet freak.

Take Care of Yourself Online

If you’ve been following my newsletters you already know that I have a very active life online. With Steve’s suggestion to date online, I’ve started to seek out potential dating partners online, too. You’re probably aware of the pitfalls of being a netizen though, two words: online safety. It’s up to you to take care of yourself online and off. I know that a lot of moms and pops read this newsletter so I’m going to rant a little and tell you to take care of your kids when they’re online, too. I know we’ve heard it all before, it’s like the movie ratings that we never really pay attention to. We’ve heard of stories, we’ve read pamphlets and know what teachers have told the kids in classrooms but safety remains an important topic to talk about as well.

It’s so important to follow a couple of basic rules. My number one rule is not to give out personal information like your address and phone number. Unless you’re dating, like me… well, I need to meet people somehow right? But if you’re single and dating, and ‘meeting’ people online make sure you meet them in a public place offline.

If you have a child, make sure they don’t give out the name or location of the school without your permission. Tell your child to inform you right away if they come across information that makes them uncomfortable. Let your child know that they have to check in with you before they get together with someone they ‘met’ online. Set up rules for going online and what’s appropriate ‘online behavior’. Most important of all, talk to your kids. I mean, I’m a single guy and all but by looking at what my sis Liz and her husband has been doing with Rachael, I know what a big difference it makes to talk to your kids. I just want you guys to be safe and to take care of yourselves.

Anyway folks, this is all the time I have this week. I’m going to leave you with Calvin Coolidge for this week’s Zen quote. He said, “If you see ten troubles coming down the road, you can be sure that nine will run into the ditch before they reach you.” For me life is all about your outlook. If you have a positive outlook, keep your chin up and roll with the punches, you’ll be fine, and things are going to work out. Just take care of yourself.

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Happy weekend in advance!

Editor, 123Greetings

P.S. Any of you guys on Orkut? I just signed up and I got no friends there! If you’d like to be my friend on Orkut click here.

27 thoughts on “Misadventures in Dating from Editor Bob

  1. Bob,

    Your newsletters are very intereting; however, a lot of times they leave me in tears.

    First of all you are “Editor Bob”.

    Secondly, I worked with a man named Bob for quite sometime then we got into the whole dating thing and then he decided to get engaged to me and make wedding plans, then broke it off! I have no clue why. Now he doesn’t even want to see me anymore.

    Any advice…I don’t know what I have done.

    Your newsletters touch so many aspects of my times with him.


  2. Where did this come from? I usually take the safe route and delete-without-reading any mail I don’t recognize; but the title grabbed my attention. (I am also involved in this on line dating stuff…)

    It’s great!!!

    Keep it coming!!!


  4. I love your newsletter. I ususally scan it and read items that get my interest. I loved the Seeking Adventures in Dating. What dating site did you use? Are you going out again? Lol!

  5. Loved reading your “misadventures in dating… and your sense of humor! It pretty well captures why after 4 years single, I haven’t had the courage to put my toes in the “water”.. not sure how I got your neswletter, but enjoyed the read………Thanks

  6. Loved the newsletter today, Bob! But have to disagree with the p.s. You added me as a friend on Orkut, silly! Hehe:)


  7. Are you aware that upon unsubscribing from this email series a scamming program attempts to illegally download a software program? I chose CANCEL and it immediately began downloading.

  8. I know several people who have been successful with online dating. HOWEVER, after some ‘bad’ experiences a few years back I’d rather be dateless than desperate! First of all, if they post a photo, don’t assume this is what the person will look like – they’ll either use photos from many years ago (thinner and younger) or ‘glamor’ shots – which are a temporary ‘fix’! Next, as I found, if they indicate they’re single or ‘separated’ make SURE they are. If they’re are going to drive, say, more than an hour away to meet you in YOUR area – this is a good indicator. Best way to find out is tell them you’ll meet them in THEIR town. See if they make any excuses, but you don’t necessarily have to go THERE if they seem comfortable (i.e., not worried about getting caught).

    To Suz: When you ARE ready to put your toes in the “water”, I wouldn’t suggest going online as a first resort. It can be intimidating, but if you do, be honest about yourself and what you’re looking for. And remember, many people will exaggerate or inflate themselves, so be careful! As I say: better dateless than desperate. I’m generally dateless but it no longer bothers me!

    Good luck to all in your endeavors to find the ‘perfect’ one!


  10. Not sure what this is about. I have used and sent 123 greetings to others in the past and only thought this was an advertisement/spam. After review, I find that once again these are shades of what I have done or discussed with another person I felt was very special when we first met, shortly after you started this blog. Then he did a 180 on me and is keeping up with the physical and emotional unavailability. I request you to please clarify. As you have no idea what my baseline and past experiences have been. I am in no way a mind reader and was given specific instructions regarding the actual meaning of the content that is on the other blog – (per the computer technician). Ciao – Puur

  11. hey Bob,
    its such a relaxing experience when i read your newsletters. Sometimes when life is little hard they just appear to be my long lost friends.And i must say that the way you showed concern for the young kids on the matter of dating is worth enough. Keep posting smiles as always

  12. Hey Bob! Great newsletter once again! I really enjoyed it. I just wanted to thank you for adding the safety rules for online dating. I also online date (not much)and I have found that people put up pics of themselves from the past not present. So, I always ask for a current picture. 🙂 Maybe this pointer can help someone not go through what I have been through in the past.



  13. No kitty dating cards? Many of us prefer cats but usually only find stale dog stuff, no fresh ideas using cats. Disappointing. More cat cards, please!


  14. hay bob,

    sharing some thoughts below, hopefully will help you sooth your soul, when feeling blue since not having much luck dating online.

    “lavender soap is the best smell of all.
    as chicken soup is to the best soul.”
    Reading about “Angels” will keep you going.
    and eating lots of spinach will give you energy to find good friends…”

    sorry, i’m waiting for my paint to dry up, so i’m just writing down what ever came across my mind… i told you odn’t make me talk! dude!

    take care

  15. I usualy dont read your newsletters but the titles keep me informed . This one keept my atention. I read it and i foud it amazing.Like editori aprecite your style.
    If you are interested to have a friend in Romania-not a date- just give me a sign.:)

  16. In a message dated 7/18/2008 6:57:59 AM Eastern Daylight Time, newsletter@123greetings.info writes:

    If you have a child, make sure they don’t give out the name or location of the school without your permission. Tell your child to inform you right away if they come across information that makes them uncomfortable. Let your child know that they have to check in with you before they get together with someone they ‘met’ online.

    ARE YOU REALLY AN EDITOR? “Child” is singular. Good way to correct this would be to change “child” to “children.” A misadventure in grammatical numbers!

  17. Hi Bob!
    Your newsletter and “dating adventures and misadventures” are humorous, and personal yet lighthearted. You also include important information about being safe and protecting your identity on the Internet. Your stories
    bring me a smile, especially the “fortune cookie.” Curious about your next newsletter- keep up the good work.

  18. Hi Bob,
    Thanks for the letter,i hope that much
    letters will come to my website and did i
    mention i like ” ”

    Love Always,

  19. Hey Hey,

    I don’t usually comment on these newsletters and stuff, but I’ve been married to my husband two years and we met via online dating site. If both parties are open and honest it works! Living my happily ever after!

  20. I have a boyfriend and he is always surrounded by a band of girlfriends. It is so unfair. You sounds like a sincere guy but you have to go for online dating. There is a Singaporean Malaysian restaurant nearby and I really love Singaporean food. I want to ask my boyfriend out for a dinner there. It seems I have to wait for months in his queue of girlfriends. He is a nice guy and very cute but his girlfriends are driving me crazy. Bob, maybe you could tell me how to ask a guy out?

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